Published on June 19th, 2016
417 Ways You Know You’re a Hopeless Wanderlust
Most any of us enjoys a change of geographic scenery, no? And many thrill to the fun of visiting a new country or two every now and again. But for some of us, that thrill has become arguably an addiction – a perpetual urge to explore ever new corners of this wondrous globe. Indeed, for some of us the entire Planet has pretty much become “home”.
Thus in a momentary flight-of-fancy, I’ve had a bit of fun here – jotting down a few stray observations that – for better or worse – mark me (might likewise mark you?) as a hopeless wanderlust.
You know you’ve slipped over to the Wanderlust dark-side when…
- You plan your itinerary for a new country while reading the in-flight magazine on your way home from your last new country.
- You often momentarily forget which country you’re in.
- You can calculate the time zones of at least 5 different friends in your head.
- You have such a large assortment of discarded sim cards that you’re thinking of starting an Etsy shop to sell sim card earrings.
- You can’t remember when you drank water out of the tap.
- You frequently say “thank you” in the wrong foreign language.
- You never grip the armrest during air turbulence.
- You’ve perfected the art of brushing your teeth – without water.
- You NEVER check baggage.
- You can barter like a pirate – and NEVER pay full price.
- Diesel fumes no longer make you gag.
- Suspicious meat no longer makes you wince.
- Street food is your preferred dish du jour.
- You’ve (necessarily) added extra pages to your passport.
- You’ve memorized – not only your passport number, but both the issue date and the expiration date, along with the place of issue (and can recite what it says on “Page 51”).
- You can fall asleep on the floor of a circus.
- You don’t call it “soccer”.
Then you might want to subscribe to my email list so you’re sure to catch my next one.
(trust that I’ll not clog your precious inbox – I generally only post but once a week.)
I can relate to a few of these, especially after February in Italy, April/May in Portugal and currently in Spain. Thank you’s, months and days are all mixed up, plus I’ve forgotten what day it is at least a dozen times since January. Hee, hee, heeeeee……
‘Tis surely a tough, grueling slog, Ted. 😉
17b You call it ‘soccer’ only in conversation with Americans.
18. When listing the names of towns and places you’ve stopped in on your current trip, residents of the country interrupt you with “Where?!” – and it wasn’t because you mispronounced the name.
19. You developed a system so when dressing in the morning, you’ll (almost) always know how many days you’ve worn each item since it was last washed.
20. You unselfconsciously acquired, and use accurately words and phrases from other native English speaking countries when conversing with people from there.
Given that it’s been 22 years since the U.S. hosted a World Cup, I should think even Americans would be up to speed by now on the name of the game. Indeed, they’re presently battling for 3rd place against Columbia in tonight’s Copa America!